While I’m not in sweatpants, I am dreading a future in the office again. And again.

I WFH from March until July and then was working hybrid Mon/Fri at home with the rest of the week in the office. My office is in a separate building from the main one, but I’d still have to walk down to the main one for specific daily meetings. Two weeks ago we got hit with a wave of COVID-19 in the office and on the shop floor, so I decided I’d not go back to the main building. And since there’s no point in my driving in to my office when I can remote in for the meetings I’d rather stay at home. So I’m home for the rest of the year. I did go get a test and it came back negative. When I was in the main office I was vigilant in wearing my mask while surrounded by people who only wore theirs half the time… and ended up positive. Watching people wear masks until they speak and then lower them grated on my nerves. I yelled at my boss in the middle of meetings to wear his mask properly.

I hated doing the hybrid routine so I’m glad to be full time WFH again. Z and I are lucky in that our home life is very easy going and we only have to worry about our cats being a bit unruly at times. I think Yuki likes having us home so she gets more pets and play time. Her routine now is to start screaming for her playtime from 10-11 am and 3 pm. She’ll roam the house, going to each of our “office” areas to see who will give her attention. All of the memes I’ve seen of cats wanting their owners to go back to the office… doesn’t quite match up with our overly social cats.

I’ve not written here in so long I don’t really know what to say anymore. What did I talk about before? Apparently I wrote a lot about clothes and while I do still like reading blogs about what people wear/buy I don’t feel as motivated to share much of what I’ve bought this year. I was supposed to start a ban in March, but totally forgot about that in the summer when I bought a lot of dresses. I have dresses now! That’s news (for me). Some of them I think were duds and I may get rid of, but most of them I like and will look forward to wearing again when it’s not 33F outside (like right now). I am wearing a fuzzy warm skirt I just got from Uniqlo and woolen tights. Oh, I wear skirts now too (more news!). I suppose when a vaccine gets out in distribution and I’m dragged kicking and screaming back to the office regularly I may share more of what I wear. I try to make sure I get dressed properly when I WFH. I at least put on day clothes right when I get up (most days). It takes me until around 10 or 11 am before I actually do something about my bedhead.

I’ve been cutting my own hair and while it’s choppy and crooked and ridiculous I at least still have my short hair to some degree. When it gets too long I start to feel off so I lock myself in the bathroom and chop at it until it becomes somewhat likable again. Right now I have a hilariously awful chopped bit in the back, but I know no one is judging so who cares…

I also stopped wearing makeup – even after I was working hybrid. I realized I didn’t need it and it only added to the time it takes me to get ready in the mornings. Since I am Professionally Lazy when it comes to getting up and going to work this time-saver was a nice revelation for me. I wash my face, put on my basic acid toner and some sunscreen. Done.

In other generalities: I’ve been journaling a lot more, which has been greatly helpful for me emotionally. I’m addicted to collecting washi tapes and stickers now. It’s hard to be all emo when writing while I’ve got dancing bears and kitten stickers on the page. I also started running again. While I’m not as consistent as I’d like to be, I’m still trying. I was doing really well until the weather turned too cold. I even improved my pacing by a full minute – after a month of work. I force myself to do sprints on the treadmill because long runs on it are nerve-wrecking for me. I play Animal Crossing New Horizons – a lot. I’ve got over 1K hours on the game and have changed the design of my island many times. I’m up to design 10.2 now. I think I’m addicted to creating new island design ideas and trying to figure out how the terraforming in my head pans out. I also don’t know what to do with a lot of the space on my island. My current design has a huge lake to take up part of it and a big weedy meadow.

I’ve no idea if this post will show up ok or not. WP has changed since I last wrote and I’ve no idea how to use it now. It took me five minutes just to figure out how to access my library so I could add a photo.

I hope everyone is doing well.

February Spending


This month was significantly more expensive than last month. There are some things I’m leaving off because the biggest thing I’m trying to curb is my wardrobe spending, so most other things get a pass – to a degree.

  • Bass penny loafers – $67.99: Yep, I bought a pair. They had a sale on the factory outlet site that had the right color of brown with a rubber sole. Still breaking them in a bit, but I think they’ll be good slip-ons in time.
  • Muji clothes – $151.25 : Returned everything and lost money (shipping to me and shipping back). Doing returns for Muji feels horribly antiquated compared to most every other company. They don’t have a return website, you literally just mail back the items after hand-writing a note on the packing slip. WTF? Get with the program Muji – create a damn return page. I’ll most likely not be buying clothes again from them.
  • Lo & Sons Waverly 2 bag – $173.60: Returned this as well. Even though the dimensions on the site made it sound like I could fit my A5 size notebook in it, the bag didn’t come close to opening the zipper pockets all the way. Plus I couldn’t snap the inner pocket closed when my XR iPhone was in a slide pocket. So that was a total NOPE.
  • Italic wallet & candle – $92.00: Liking the smaller wallet a lot. It’s forced me to only keep what few cards I actually need and I don’t carry change anymore and now know I never really needed a coin section to begin with.
  • Norstrom Rack – $33.94: Bought two bras, but am going to return one because it was too small.
  • JetPens journal accessories – $79.64: While I’m not counting my Hobonichi purchase this month because I’m considering that a very good and worthwhile investment I’m using quite a bit already, I am going to dig myself financially for buying a bunch of stickers, stencils and washi tapes for decorative purposes.
  • Apple (in-game purchase) -$33.90: I’m still bad at buying Leaf Tickets for Animal Crossing Pocket Camp.
  • Etsy – $142.15: I bought myself a sapphire ring. I got a bonus so I used some of that to pay for the ring. I’d been wanting to get myself a nice simple ring with my birthstone for a while and when the KHIM shop had a good sale going on I jumped on it. My ring is with white gold, so it’s the bottom one from the photo above.

Total spent: $774.47.  Returned: $327.85. Actual monthly spent: $446.62.

Looking at those numbers is slightly terrifying and giving me a serious reality check. And that’s not even including the Adagio teas, the Hobonichi Techo Weeks, and a few other items that I’ve mentally put in my: “I would buy these things no matter what” category.

Part of me also knew this month would be bad because I’d been taking a hard look at things I’ve got and realized I am ready now to do a proper shopping ban. Knowing that I let myself got a bit wild spending to get it out of my system. I’m still working out the parameters of the ban so I’ll post about it later, but for now I’m realizing that this monthly spending report is a good way for me to kick myself in the ass and get my financial bearings back.


Saying no – most of the time

Yuki is not impressed

It’s almost February and I thought I’d do a spending recap for this month.

  • Clothing: $90 – Everlane skinny jeans and Everlane long sleeve tee.
  • Amazon: $54.06 – Jane Iredale lip stain in pink and eye lash extender mascara.
  • Apple: $46.62 – Game app (my unhealthy relationship with Animal Crossing Pocket Camp has been affecting my spending lately with buying game items)

I’m not including the one time I’ve ordered UberEats nor the new pillows I ordered in this spending. I needed new pillows and sometimes take-out is just what we need for stressful work days – so I consider it a sort of mental health type of thing. The three bullets above are definitely things I did not need in the slightest, but I bought them. $190.68 cents worth of unnecessary items. I don’t regret any of them, but it is eye-opening for me to see the numbers like this. I didn’t even spend much this month. I know I’ve done much worse in the past, but seeing how those three bullets add up is really making me think I need to pay much more attention to my extraneous spending.

For some reason I’ve got it in my head I really need penny loafers as well. I’m not going to spend any more money this month, but for the past several weeks I keep looking at these from Bass:

The left one is the natural sole and the right is their easy sole, which just means it’s made out of rubber and is more flexible instead of the typical stacked leather. I like the look of the natural, but know the easy sole may be more comfortable because it’s more flexible. What got me thinking about penny loafers? To be brutally, stupidly honest – a character from an anime I really like. *head*desk* The character is a professional and she always wears the same black suit and penny loafers. I love the her wearing black and brown together. Seeing the loafers on her made me think when I wore penny loafers when I was younger. I had one pair I wore to death. They were the typical wine colored ones like these, but with a leather sole:


I prefer the cognac or brownish kind more these days and I think they would go better with my current wardrobe than this traditional color. But I don’t really need them! Aside from idolizing Akane Tsunemori (the anime character), the classic look of penny loafers – along with the weather – got me thinking about wearing more of a uniform at work and sticking to basics, classics, comfortable jeans. A simple look to put on repeat. I came to the brutal realization lately that I really didn’t need to buy 90% of the clothes I’ve gotten over the past two years I’ve had my slightly more professional job. I can easily get away with wearing a nice top and the same jeans and that’s it. The one Yohji suit I got was a good investment for conferences and client visits, but most everything else… I could’ve easily done without. I don’t need penny loafers to make my ideal uniform in my head! Talk me out of this!

Now for something I did buy, which shocked me:

Even though I returned the last pair of Everlane jeans and swore off the brand for jeans entirely I still couldn’t quit the idea that maybe, somehow, there was an Everlane jean that would work for me. I finally found it in the “authentic-stretch” skinny jean. I don’t know what the heck “authentic stretch” means, but the contents of the jeans are basically more stretch than the other pairs I’ve tried. They are thinner than my trusty Grana Japanese slim style ones ( I really wish Grana would bring those back), but they are nice enough. I do like the mid-rise is higher up on me than my Grana’s. That being said, I don’t think I’ll ever need another pair. Between the trusty Grana’s in blue and the new skinnies in washed black I’m covered for jeans. I also got another long sleeve tee in the new green color that just came out. I have a black one that’s horribly faded, but the fit and softness can’t be beat, so I caved when I saw they came out with a green color. Lately I want everything green and brown.

Another item that’s been catching my eye is the teddy-bear looking cardigan. Almost every brand has a version of it now whether it’s fleece or polyester or whatever – it basically looks like someone skinned a teddy bear. Some of them look meh, but a few have me thinking maybe I’d like one – but I already have three perfectly good cardigans already and I honestly don’t wear them too much! I’m saying no to the poor fleeced teddy bear.


Yuki is not amused at my first-world-shopping-problem plight.


The need for nothing

Happy New Year. Winter is here and so is my Busy Season.

winter white


I think this is the first year in a long time that I did not get one single item of clothing for Christmas or purchase clothing between Christmas and New Year’s.

That’s not a bad thing.

After the failed ban last year and my splurges on the latter half of 2019 I feel like something’s clicked. Sure there are some things I’d like, but when I’ve actively gone out looking for them I end up leaving empty-handed with an “eh” kinda feeling. Of course that doesn’t mean I won’t buy something later, but right now I’m liking my devil-may-care attitude that I don’t need anything.

Despite the few things that I think I may like, I’m quite stable and happy with what I have and rotate out everything regularly. Granted, it’s been a mild winter so far, which may be factoring into why I’m ok with everything as is.

So far this year I have made other purchases than clothing. I bought new pillows and am waiting for them to arrive. They are nice hotel-style pillows so they were more expensive than the average pillow. Although I’m not entirely certain what “average” pricing is for a pillow since I’ve not bought any in several years. $20? $30? The ones I got were on sale. Hopefully they’ll work out for me.

I’m also waiting on a new desk. I’ve been journal writing a lot more lately and want to set up a proper space for myself to write. I got a Polaroid mobile printer for Christmas that makes little picture stickers from photos on my phone (or photos I took with my camera that are on my phone via iCloud…) Having little 2×3 photos to add to my journal entries is nice. It’s like adding photos to a blog, but I’m literally adding them to my private journal. For a while I thought: then why don’t I just blog more? Well, I realized I need a place to write strictly for myself. Adding some visuals helps keep me motivated. Also, I bought a ton of stickers. I don’t even care how silly it is that a 44 year old woman picks out stickers to add to her journal entries. Even when I write about depressing or angering things there’s something hilarious about adding a frowny face sticker or stickers of clouds to put the reality of what I’m writing into perspective. And that’s what I think I need more than anything else. Put it down – outside of myself – but don’t try to treat any of it like the end of the world.

I’m in for a whole world of hurt coming up at work. It’ll be hell for at least two months and I think I’m mentally preparing myself by creating a safe haven for myself to write and keep my sanity.

I have realized one thing so far this year – I already spend way too much money on Amazon purchases. It’s too easy because I have prime membership. That’ll be something to curb this year. In order to do so I think I’ll do monthly spending tracking posts. That ought to be rather eye-opening.

I do need to buy a chair for my new desk. Right now my desk is a ten year old IKEA Ingo dining room table. My current “chair” is an Ikea storage ottoman with a pillow on top for added cushioning. Once I get the new desk with a better height for writing I’ll definitely need a better chair. Any suggestions? While I know a computer chair is the standard, I’m more open to other options. Also, I’m trying to stay away from getting a black chair.


Hits and Misses

Considering I started off 2019 with a shopping ban, I ended up purchasing a lot of items when I broke the ban and let the flood gates open to buying whatever the hell I wanted. Granted, I did have very specific things in mind and ironically those things ended up only being “meh” for the most part. What surprised me were the items I randomly bought that have ended up being staples and complete wardrobe game changers for me.

I’ll start with the most mind blowing purchases first…

cocoona skinwearsilk brassilk underwear

Silk underwear by Cocoona Skinwear. The silk reminds me of some Eileen Fisher silk shirts I’ve seen where the fabric is durable but still almost sheer and has a bit of give to it. It is not a size inclusive company by any means because… Japan. Their sizes are literally small and smaller according to US standards, but in Japan these come in “medium” and “large”. I purchased the larger size of all the underwear and while I could’ve gotten away with the medium, I’m perfectly happy with the extra give on the large. The colors are neutral and gorgeous. The material is incredibly soft and feels like it could rip easily in my hands. That being said, this underwear has held up really well. It’s expensive – on par with Victoria’s Secret when not on sale, but after I bought two pairs of bottoms I was immediately hooked and made more purchases of it over a few months to replace all of my old nylon underwear I’d worn for at least 6 years.

I agonized over the purchases because they were pricey, but also because I kept telling myself I can find something like this in the US. There has to be a company that can make this sort of awesomeness here, right? I waited a few months even before purchasing the first items, doing extensive research online. I scoured Etsy and tried looking at all independent and sustainable companies I could find. While doing so I realized something that I greatly dislike about western advertising: it’s all about showing off women. The advertising for the Cocoona items was so simple and straight forward and even prudish it made me feel more comfortable purchasing it – for as odd as that sounds. In the end, I couldn’t find anything even close to Cocoona here or anywhere. To view the pages for the bras and underwear go here and here. There used to be an English translation of the pages on the site, but they’ve since taken it down so I don’t know if they are still selling outside of Japan.

The fit is “granny style” and even bags a tiny bit. However, that’s not a negative. In fact, it made me wonder if I’d been wearing the wrong size underwear for a long time. With some items of clothing there is VPL, but due to how much coverage I get with these, it’s hardly an issue and I’ve given up on trying to hide any VPL anymore. I just want to be comfortable and this underwear is the most comfortable I’ve ever worn. The bras are more like bralettes because due to the fabric. There are no wires and the padding is removable. This is by no means at all a one-fit-for-everyone kind of underwear, but it is perfect for me and I’m glad I found it.

Now that I’ve posted far more than necessary on underwear, here are some other really good purchases I’ve made this year….

cotton silk sweater

Cotton silk sweater from Muji. I bought this over the summer on sale and it’s become one of my go-to sweaters.

cotton waffle sweater

Cotton waffle sweater from Muji – bought the same day as the above sweater during the summer and on sale. I had no intention of buying either of these, but I love them both. The waffle sweater I wear at least twice a week now that the temps have dipped below 40F. Next to my forest green lambswool sweater, this waffle one is the warmest sweater I have and very easy to style.

The beige Uniqlo pant in the above photo is also new and another amazing-but-not-planned purchase. Uniqlo has upped the styling on their e-z ankle pant. I have a navy pair of the older edition and can wear them year round. The beige ones are definitely a step up in styling and will become an easy year-round staple as well.

merino wool turtleneck

Merino wool turtleneck sweater from COS. I fell in love with the color and bought it. It’s not my favorite out of all of these, but I find myself reaching for it more often than not because it’s easy to wear. The long ribbed cuffs are a bit awkward feeling when I first put the sweater on, but I get used to it throughout the day. In general, I’m glad to see more true forest green colors instead the usual army-ish olive-like color that most companies pass off as green.

BTW, the blue pant above are the older Uniqlo e-z pant I’ve had for years.

wool turtleneck

Wool turtleneck sweater from Pas de Calais. I bought this on a massive sale and it’s by far the softest sweater I own. It feels softer than the cashmere sweater my mom bought me a couple years ago. The size is very loose and the wool is so thin it’s a bit sheer so I have to wear a nude bra underneath. Despite being so gauze-like it is extremely warm.

The cardigan over it is the cotton one from Everlane. I generally don’t tie up the sash on it and am thinking of just taking it off entirely. This has also been a good layering piece when the temperature got cooler.

And now for the not so great purchases…

wide leg jeans

The Chimala wide-leg jeans that are not advertised as being wide-leg anywhere at all. In fact, from any listings I’ve seen of these jeans, they don’t have any indicator of “straight” or “wide” or anything. If I’d known, I probably would not have bought them. They are much tighter in the waist than I thought and I’m realizing I’m not a fan at all of high-waist jeans. I don’t think they look good on me and have a hard time styling them. The verdict is out on what I plan to do with this rather expensive blunder item.

pinkish shoes

Pink-ish Moma shoes. I was having a weird moment where I was very tempted by pastels for a while. The shoes weren’t all that expensive since I got them on a major sale, but I’m wondering how much mileage I’ll really get out of them. Maybe I’ll crave them more in the spring? They deliberately look a bit beaten up by design.

The linen items I bought that were the initial reason for breaking my shopping ban this year are still in rotation. The heavy linen pant get worn a lot on the weekends. They are warm and easy to throw on for when I want to go out and not look too lazy. The dress is waiting for warmer weather and so is the button-down green shirt. It’s amusing to me that those were the things I looked forward to the most and now they are just… there.

While this doesn’t cover all the things I bought, this highlights what helped me understand what I want in my own styling a lot better. I’m definitely a uniform type of person for winter wear. Other seasons tend to be a mixed bag of mood swings though…

I don’t have any planned purchases. The last purchase I made was over the weekend for a new pair of running shoes. I’ve been a bit more vigilant in exercising regularly – until I got food poisoning a few days ago…. Anyway, I’ve been much better about writing down what exercise goals I have and keeping to them. They are very simple:

  • Run 1 mile
  • Dumbbell squats
  • Overhead press
  • Chin-ups
  • Push-ups
  • Monster walk (this is done using a tied theraband around my ankles)
  • Dumbbell balance (a single leg balance exercise made more difficult with weight)

While that’s not all that I do, that’s just a sample and I only do 4 when I exercise with the mile run always being one of them. I’m not worried about reps or weight amounts right now. I’m just trying to get a regular routine in place first. I put a Bosu ball on my wishlist because I really do need to work on balancing more. The last two trips I took  had a Bosu ball I used in the gyms and realized it’s quite handy. I have terrible balance in general and I’m stubborn enough to keep at it if I have something to work with so an exercise device for that is best for me.

Reading: First Principles by Herbert Spencer. It’s been a long time since I read an older book so putting my Ye-Olde-Speaketh-Much-More-Than-Seemingly-Necessary-to-Reach-Thine-Theoretical-Point-Supposedly hat on reminded me of how rusty I’ve gotten. 18th and 19th century classics were my jam many many years ago, but since I’ve switched to manga I feel as though I’m trying to learn how to breath again. I forgot how amazingly long some sentences can get in these old tomes. Ten years ago Charles Dickens, Jane Austen, William Makepeace Thackeray, Dostoevsky, and Strachey were read religiously. Now – not so much, but it’s made me all the more aware of how we’ve collectively inherited ADD. We’ll see how well I get through this book.

So I guess this is my end-of-year update of sorts. I hope all who read this – especially this far – have very Happy Holidays.

Itching for something different

The end of the year brings tension, excitement and expectations of something “different” about to happen. Resolutions come to mind. Will new goals penned down stick? Lately I’ve been rewatching some old anime shows and reminding myself of how much I learn from the characters. Honestly, it doesn’t matter if it’s anime, a tv show or a movie. Resonance with a character always brings to mind: What would I do in this situation? How would this character act if they were in mine?

I’ve had many fluttering thoughts about changes and wonder if I can make them or if they are worth considering at all?

  • Can I try another shopping ban this year? Is it necessary considering the “itch” I had this year when I tried to do one came undone. Is the itch over? Have I learned from it? Since I’m not remotely tempted by anything and feel the need to change my focus, would it even be beneficial to chain myself down to doing one anyway?
  • Should I try making a more structured routine to my life in general? Will this help me get my exercising and eating habits back on track? Will I fall off the wagon again like I did before because I achieved my goal previously and didn’t know where to go afterwards? Am I even capable of having a more regimented routine when I’ve been notoriously slovenly and disdainful of anything disrupting my freedom to do whatever I want – even if I’ve self-imposed my own rules? I’ve always done what I want when I wanted. I am spoiled and privileged. Perhaps I need that structure now more than ever.

I still struggle with finding the right jeans. I bought a pair of Everlane skinny jeans and returned them. It was disturbing how they fit. Perfectly at the waist, but even with the elastic in them the legs were too tight. And yet, when looking on the website one can view how those jeans fit on different body types – to a degree. The smaller sizes still stick to a specific body type. I have no doubt the larger ones do too. I bought size 27, which general equates to a US size 4 – and yet I felt like I was busting out of the legs. My legs are more muscular and did not fit the mould of skinny legs – my thighs were tight and my calves were trapped. I almost went into a panic trying to get the jeans off me since the ankles felt like vices. If I sized up then the waist would be too big. After returning the jeans I looked in the back of my closet and saw the dark blue Grana jeans I’d not worn in 6 months or so. Over the summer I told myself I would turn them into jean shorts. I’m glad I didn’t because they fit just fine. I wore them a few times this week and Z even asked if they were new. No, I’d just not worn them in a while. I’m glad I’m over the Mari Kondo phase because keeping those jeans helped me out this week.

Shopping feels tedious now. I’m not motivated at all by looking at pinterest for style inspiration or ideas. I’m not inspired by anything new now because I’ve started accepting everything I have and started wearing a sort of uniform this winter. Whenever I’ve been tempted by something, I’ve stopped and told myself – I already have x thing that’s just fine. I don’t need anything else or a replica or the newest version. Maybe I’m starting to learn how to truly appreciate what I have? Is this a temporary phase? I’ve become more preoccupied with enriching my mind and getting myself into better shape. No – “better shape” is the wrong phrase. There’s nothing wrong with my shape, but rather – I want to feel the strength I did a few years ago when the soreness of my muscles made me smile each day after a workout. Feeling the shape of muscle under my skin made me happy. Being able to do so much with so little effort due to my strength was invigorating. Shopping has been replaced with strengthening.  The caveat to all of this is I still suck at keeping a consistent routine, hence why I’m tempted to get a bit militant on myself.

Winter weather really is the best time to make one stop and consider what one has and whether or not it is enough. I’m not bothered at all by constantly wearing the same sweaters and pant combinations over and over. It’s comforting and it works. It helps that I’m so cold in the mornings I get dressed without thinking – I just need to put clothes on to keep warm. I’ve also given up taking any outfit photos because the lighting is horrible and even though I do have the studio light I wasn’t a fan of how those photos came out when I used it last year. Therefore outfit photos are on hiatus until spring!

The winter will be spent forcing myself to keep a routine, reading more in order to open up my head and attempt to undo inherited ADD due to social media and the fast pace of society in general. I’m also focusing on writing more for myself. That combined with exercise and fretting about keeping my plants alive should be more than plenty to deal with outside of work. Maybe I’ll have many more navel-gazing posts in the future.

For now, here are some photos I took from Thanksgiving break. Z had to work the Father Ted Village Turkey Trot again this year. While he worked I wandered around Balboa Park. We’d been there before, but much more was added and had changed from several years ago. Over half the Japanese Friendship Garden was closed then, so I got to see all the new sections. I have a thing for Japanese lanterns. I love them and we have one out front of our house and I want many more.


This bonsai is roughly 45 years old. I saw the garden caretakers working on it with little clippers and tiny scissors and brushes.

bridgelantern and waterlanternsmall lanternsquat lanterntall lantern


A Sunday

Bento feetRandom thoughts interspersed with random photos I’ve taken.

Yesterday Z and I went to a friend’s pool party. She has it every year – going for 5 years now. It’s a birthday pool party for her (she and Z were born on the same day so she’ll say happy birthday to him when everyone else is singing to her). I spent 3 hours in the pool talking to a friend. I only talk to him at the pool party each year and we always catch up on what we’ve done over the year. He’s a shrink (for children with disabilities/ trauma) and I told him what’s happened in my family. His compassion and wit have always been welcome so I felt fine talking to him about everything and it is why we always go back to talking to each other each year. I asked if he’d gotten a new watch because he’s got an obsession with buying watches. He showed me the latest one and then told me about his current death metal craze where he’s screaming  lyrics in a closet with a guitar and a dirty litter box and his wife dancing all happy around him just to annoy him. I laughed almost the whole three hours while getting prune-like in the pool.


I took two pairs of shoes to a local cobbler. One pair needed the soles replaced entirely. While the sole part was well done I wasn’t overly thrilled with how he handled cleaning my shoes from the salt and water spots. I kinda feel like he made them more obvious. The other pair of shoes needed to be glued back together with a good polishing and those look ok. He put a couple stitches in the bottom of the heel so if the glue comes apart again they will still stay together. I just hope the stitching doesn’t cause the shoes to get leaks in the bottom now if I’m out in rainy weather. If I need to go to a cobbler again sometime soon I might try out a different one.


I’ve recently replaced all of my old nylon underwear with silk. It was expensive but considering how long underwear lasts me I wasn’t too bothered by the price. The old nylon underwear was from Target and I’d bought it probably 6 or 7 years ago at least. There were pills all over them, elastic strings sticking out of them and some of the stretch was gone. The old bras were getting dimpled in the padded cup area and generally looked very sad. The new silk bras have removable padding and they have a triangle shape instead of cups, which looks more natural and are much more comfortable in general. The silk panties do feel a little like baggy granny style, but I’m really enjoying them because I’m tired of the lower rise underwear I’ve worn for so long. Also, this is the first time in 30 years I’ve had matching underwear; colors are taupe, medium grey and black.


I’ve been having a pinkish moment. I still don’t like straight up pink, but I’m leaning more towards mauve and taupe, which have pink accents. The cotton-linen cardigan I wore this week was labeled “pink beige” from the site I bought it from (same site as the underwear). I just consider it mauve. Also, I recently bought some shoes that said they were “light grey” in the description, but they actually look like they have a pinkish tone to them. At first this startled me, but I’m liking them a lot as an accent to darker outfits.


I am by no means a minimalist nor very good at being sustainable. I am taken too much by whimsy and influenced easily. That being said I am trying to take little steps. I bought cleaning cloths for cleaning the bathrooms and kitchen. Each room has different colored cloths and some have little more texture on them for scrubbing than others. I’m using these now instead of paper towels to clean. I’m also getting away from standard detergents and using more natural based cleaners. I’m nowhere near a vinegar and baking soda natural standard but again – little steps. My mom always used the same wash cloths she’d clean her face with for cleaning the bathroom and wiping down the shower with her bath towel and throwing it all in the laundry at the end of the week. I was doing that, but realized I felt something dirty about doing that. I like items to have specific uses so no, I’m not going to use my facial wash cloth to also scrub the grime in the bottom of the tub. That is a different cloth with a different purpose.

Lastly, I just tried replanting my spiderwort plant and I might’ve destroyed it! It hadn’t been watered so the plant starting tearing up from the roots. I’m terrified now so I left the plant in the same pot and gave it water and am keeping all limbs and fingers crossed it survives.

Too early for this ****


Helmut Lang silk shirt – Everlane sweater – The Row pant – Frye Carly Chukkas – Yuki cat bombing my photo, taken by Z.

I left work early due to snow. Technically, this was a week ago because I’m a week ahead on my photos. OMG snow already! UGH. I live in a hilly area so driving home in snowy weather is a survival sport. I swear when I leave work I scream: WITNESS ME! (Mad Max Fury Road reference – bonus because my haircut makes me look like Imperator Furiosa). It sucked because what is on an ideal day a 20 minute drive in to work – took me an hour to get home due to road closures (the main one I take) and cars driving super slow and sliding like idiots all over the road after two inches of snow fell.

In any case I got home early (yay!) and got on the treadmill because many of my steps during my day are taken while storming through the shop floor, checking on part orders and then walking back to furiously write emails about updates and issues and then panicking and taking a walk around the parking lot. Only now said parking lot is covered in snow and it’s generally too cold to do so outside. Grrr… my daily walk-breaks are routine at work and I’m a bit out of sorts now because I can’t get that fresh air break and move around. Z asks why I don’t just walk laps around the shop floor and well… that’s because it’s literally packed to the gills with machines, tools and odds and ends and the floors are super slippery and I have to wear special non-slip shoes when I’m on the shop floor. It’s not an ideal place to take a leisurely walk. That in itself is some kind of survival sport. I see the shop floor like a potentially deadly Rube-Goldberg machine. For those curious as to why, just look up CNC machine videos on Youtube.

So earlier this week I mentioned getting more sweaters and I’ll admit, I’ve already broken my non-promise to stop spending money on clothes. I ordered some items from TRR and I’m about to order more items – mostly sweaters – from a fast-fashion site. Boo. Hiss. I’m awful. Start the lynching! Why am I doing this!?!

A. Because I have plans to go on a full on clothing shopping ban in 2019.
B. (This is a long, bullshit excuse so bear with it…) I love sweaters and since I did the KonMari thing and threw out several, I’ve been trying to make up for that since then (seriously, KonMari-ing my wardrobe was a mistake I’m still making up for) and I know the brands on the fast-fashion site (Yesstyle) I plan on buying these items from will not disappoint. I’m buying for the long haul – meaning they will last me a really long time so no I don’t feel bad about it. These sweaters will not only last this winter but many more to come. That is my goal.
C. I can’t find the styles of sweaters I like anywhere else. I’ve tried several second hand places and sometimes the shit I find on TRR makes me wonder: who da fuq would buy that if it was $5 let alone $150 or $525!?

Plans for this weekend? Hanging plants! I’ve gone full-on bonkers for taking care of plants now and I’ve begged Z to get the right anchoring thing-a-majiggies for plaster ceilings we need for hanging plants indoors. I have a nursery I love and have had a horrible habit of driving to Every. Single. Weekend. to just look at plants. I think one of the guys there who sees me all the time may think I’m lonely or something.

Anyway, hope everyone is having a good long holiday weekend (hopefully) in the US.


Reminder: malls are soul sucking

Thursday I was rushing out the door and by some streak of genius I remembered I had PT and needed to take an outfit photo in the morning. Once I get into PT clothes (workout wear) it’s game over for any nice outfit photos because I become such a sweaty mess. I completely skipped last week’s photos because of that. So I took a quick phone photo in the long mirror in the basement. I wore all blue: denim top, navy pants, navy new (to me, but used from TRR) Jil Sander leather sneakers.


This is what happens when I get distracted from what I want to buy. What I wanted, was a black oxford style shoe. What I bought was a navy leather sneaker (they are actually really comfortable and I’ve worn them all weekend) and an Ann Demeulemeester black button down. I failed, but also won at the same time because I really like both the things I bought, so… it’s a tie?


Friday I wore the JS shoes again (and again on Saturday at a house warming party). They are keepers. My elephant top is so beat up and there are runs all over it when you see it up close, but for some reason I can’t quit this top and that is high praise for it. It’s perfect for warm weather and I always get compliments on it. This was definitely one of those instances where fast fashion wins. friday

Today I went to the mall in search of a bathing suit. I bought two from Target a few years ago and the bottoms of the bikini one had a sort of skirt on it. It was so shredded I was kinda embarrassed to wear it recently when Z and I went lake swimming. I got rid of it as soon as we got home. I wasn’t planning another bathing suit purchase but the father-in-law got a hot tub for Father’s Day and despite it being 90F outside they want us to come over today to go sit in it and have BBQ.

I searched Bloomingdales and Macys and nearly cried at the selection, let alone the fact that my size is mythical (size 4). Bloomingdales only had swim suits for woman who want all of their ass showing and Macys only had swimsuits with ten thousand tags on them saying: Tummy Control! Slimming! Look 10 lbs lighter with this slimming silhouette! (I shit you not on the last one – that was actually written on a tag on a whole rack of bathing suits.) Basically every Macy’s suit was hardcore spanx meant to squeeze the living soul out of anyone who dared wear them – not to mention there were none in my size.

The only time my size becomes available in bathing suits is when they go on sale for the upcoming season – in fucking March. We had 4 snow storms in March so buying a bathing suit wasn’t anywhere on my agenda. But the fact is there are such a limited amount of the small sizes made that even if I went shopping earlier in the season, I’d still be hard pressed to find it. I went into one of the smaller Land’s End shops and an SA tried to help me. I told her finding my size was the hardest part and when I mentioned it to her, she actually grimaced and said, “Well…. there might be one….. somewhere….” I was looking for a two piece, but I don’t like tankinis, which is all they had, so I left.

I checked Nordstrom Rack, but that was also a let down and walked across the whole mall back to where I parked. I did notice something though – half the shops were closed. The particular mall I was at is kinda known for being the “better” mall of a few in a 40 mile radius, but it was really depressing seeing all the junk on display and so many shops closed up. It felt a bit foreboding like –  The End is Nigh for this one. I noticed Macys is doing a Backstage department now that’s sorta like Nordstrom Rack, but for really cheap stuffs that don’t sell regularly at Macys? I don’t know. It just felt like I was walking into an inevitable thrift store of crap no one would want even if it was $1.00.

I did end up finding a bathing suit at a sporting goods store near the mall. The selection was minuscule but it helped me focus on finding something and they actually had my size. I paid a bit more than I would have liked, but the material seems good and will hopefully last longer than the Target swim suits.




I think I have a pant addiction. It used to be running shoes, but since I won’t be running for a while my new thing is to obsess over the cut and style of pants. I just bought two more pairs before writing this post – both black (of course). I know a lot of people who just wear the same pants over and over and over with different tops. Maybe I’ll do the reverse where I wear one top constantly and change out the pants. That sounds very amusing to me, but I’ve also had a Scotch. Last minute meetings and coworkers blowing up at each other made for an interesting day at work.

What clothing addictions do you have? Any specific kind of item? Silk shirts? Cardigans? Shoes? Socks?

I also bought another pair of barefoot style shoes that look more professional than the ones in the top photo. I like the Lems (above) but something about them feels too casual. Maybe I just need to change out the shoe laces. I don’t really like them. Also, I already need to buff the EF shoes because I’m wearing them so much they are scuffing a lot faster than I realized. They are also really soft leather, which doesn’t help. I did get a compliment on them today though.

We are seeing Infinity War tonight with friends. It should be a lot of fun. I’m not a hardcore Marvel fan, but I like the movies because they are good action films and seeing them with a bunch of friends in a full theater makes it even more fun.